We Deserve Top Tier Love
In this essay I will discuss how Black women sabotage our chance at happiness by reverting back to problematic romantic relationships in the name of settling for the devil you know under the delusion that we are in control of the chaos.
I am actually pissed about Issa & Lawrence getting back together. Black women not only deserve a fresh start but we deserve PEACE. Why is it so stereotypical that Black women seek refuge in the comfort of men that didn’t deserve us when they had us in the first place. OF COURSE it’s easier to go into a situation with the devil we know BUT is that what we really deserve?
we subconsciously self-sabotage our chance at happiness
I think we subconsciously self-sabotage our chance at happiness. Instead of turning the page in name of #GROWTH*insert Kelli meme*, we seek the chaotic comfort that we can “control”. Why is that!? Why go back to an ex that didn’t deserve us after we let him slide the first time for being unfaithful? Why go back to the devil we know instead of embracing the potential of PEACE that we have waiting on the other side?
I want more for us! I want us to ONLY ACCEPT PEACE. The reason Issa ending up with Lawrence pisses me off is because we see this CONSTANTLY. We saw this recently with Camille & Ian on Harlem. The day before this man was about to get married my good sis chose VIOLENCE. Why?! She sabotaged a safe space she was creating with Jameson, for an old fling. Sure they love each other & very clearly never got over those feelings but have you ever thought that maybe just maybe what the heart wants is wrong?
As Black women we go back to the man that had a baby on us & justify it by saying we were technically broken up. Is that man really worth 18 years of baby momma drama? Is it worth coming second to him? When a man has a baby, that child becomes his top priority and you are now his second. IDC what a man says, if you’re dating him AFTER he’s had a bay, you are no longer his #1 priority.
Issa choosing/ending up with Lawrence angers me because in a day and age when women are MORE independent than ever we are still taking massive Ls in relationships. We are talking about a women who identified a niche, built a successful business, and found strategic partners to uplift her community! She also deserves happiness & peace. Issa deserves TOP TIER love not this bottom of the barrel happy hour special she’s settled with. Of course one episode won’t tell us how happy she is BUT I feel like she still deserved more. This rushed ending to INSECURE didn’t do Issa’s character arc justice at all.
NOW MOLLY!? My good sis leveled up. She found peace in an emotionally mature lover who didn’t give a rats *ss about her past relationships. I’m proud of Molly for choosing peace and TOP TIER LOVE. I was nearly brought to tears seeing her get married. She’s been through so much and seeing that full circle moment redeemed the Issa L.
As women we deserve & should intentionally choose more! We owe it to ourselves & the generations that preceded us. Our ancestors stayed in traumatic tumultuous relationships because they couldn’t do better with their resources. As millennial women we can chose our realities. We should only ACCEPT BIGGER & BETTER. No more going back to an ex who wasn’t where he should have been when you two were together. We deserve to be SECURE, at PEACE and experience TOP TIER love.
Sorry but Issa & Lawrence are a NO for me.
